TurquoiseStarr

I can feel myself falling into a depression.  I don't want to do anything but sit and do nothing. I laugh, but I'm not happy.  If people ask how I am, I can easily put  on a fake smile and say that I'm great.  I hate that about myself.  I can be so fake.  I hate that my emotion is so deeply connected to someone else and that I have no control over it.  I'm sad all the time and I cry often.  I hate thinking of Austin because it sends me tumbling into yet another breakdown.  I'm not worried about him, I just miss him and I want him to miss me.  I want him to need me, but he doesn't.  He's going to be just fine without me and that scares me so much.  I can't go on like this for much longer before I go crazy.